#i think it might be bc i dont have any irl friends so i only rlly go out with my parents

[friendlessclown]

why are ppl so fuckign scaryyy :(((

[astrxealis]

what theme :(( hmm

[strab3rr]

ive been thinking abt a week? to delete my account or my story but u know what idgaf anymore because its just gonna give those people more courage for accusing me of being a liar

oh u dont know what im talking bout rn how cute

I was in the hospital til 2 days ago. as a patient. and i believe this happened bc of some jealousy bitches (or im just bein a drama queen)

ik it sounds like im blaming someone but irl yes i do blame someone

in dog years i blame those bitches

last week? i dont even remember what the day

mom got sick again but its okay shes fine now and then i had a car crash🪩🤩🪩my phone died in the crash literally died i had to buy a new one do you guys have any idea abt how much are this things in my country i really dont care abt the money but be for real wtf actually

i answered all of your questions carefully and with kindness i tried to be there for you guys and the moment i tell you abt my success story i had an accident! um sir wtf am i really being dramatic rn? cause ive been thinking bout this for days and theres no other explanation even if there is i cant see

so here it goes,,, i was just chilling in my home and then i read a dm about a girl that she wants to get in her void and as always i explained how she can get in but she kept ask me about how to get in but like girl hellooo i literally told you how. r u kidding me is this a social experiment to evaluate my patience? and then i said to her that this is the only thing that she should do for getting into

she said, no you are lying it cant be like this! bla bla

i transformed to this cat at that moment this is real me now.

anyway at the end of that conversation she said that im lying, if any of these(my manifestation results) are true then i should show her bc she have "doubts🎀" aww for her doubts i should reveal my self in her home bc she have doubts🎀 i should transport there with my void and show her how to do it irl thats what she asked me no- thats what she commanded me to, she was like "do it" and i was like "what😃" i said no ofc what do u want me to say, ok lets do itt lets break my privacy togetherrr let me get in your void for you and again let me do make your dreams comes true yayyy itll be fun right😍😍😍

i dont even know what to say to that

maybe this?

u think im joking which ur right bc i am

but its kinda serious here buddy what should i say to you when u command me to get in your void for you, like how can i reject you and still be that kind sister for u?

anyway i said no to her and she said im a lair and i broke her heart with my selfishness(then i blocked her ofc)then i go out w my friends this is the part i got hit by a car😇

opened my eyes into the white light like im a mf drama movie character

while im in the hospital i thought i can delete my account and can get rid of this bad luck/shits once and for all but again its just gonna give those bitches courage and they think that they right

"loa is a cult and everyone is a liar bc they cant prove bla bla" dont u dare to blame me for your failure

you didn't got in AND you want me to do it for you???honey im sorry for your loss bc it seems like you just lost your dignity yeah we just buried it u missed such a precious moment🥲

and guess what i have nothing to prove you i literally dont have to prove anything to you. like for real. if you dont believe the story can u just move on please? bc i dont give a damn shit about your insecurities, your doubts and ur blablabla

its literally on you girl BC IT SUPPOSED TO BE YOUR MF REALITY? LIKE DO YOU REALLY NEED A MANUAL BOOK FOR THIS?

im sorry for being a bitter today but i really feel like this(bitter), so not sorry maybe😗

but i didn't mean it when i said idgaf to ur insecurities.. i do honey its just been a rough week and i dont know how to put my anger in to the words

it can be a evil eye 🧿 or i just might be a drama queen sooo.. again sorry(?) if anything offends u, i love you guys but its just so complicated here(my head) and i just dont know

and now im just being weird w all this nonsense

i should go now, i will return your dms asap just need some rest

loves, siena

[aropride]

saw ur recommendation for 3m aura n95s 👀👀 any advice on where to get them from? heading back 2 school in a few weeks and wanna stock up — tysm !!!!!

ok so!! my first recommendation is to see if there is a mask block near you, in my area it was CRANE (covid resistance action northeast), they're having trouble stocking and filling orders rn so mine took ~a month to arrive but the time would've passed anyway as they say . if ur in a more urban area ur a lot more likely to have one near u tbh, idk if it'd work but it'd be worth reaching out to the closest one even if they're not technically working in ur exact area just to see . here's a map of mask blocs worldwide- they're mostly in america (continent - but mostly in the US+canada) & europe (mostly in great britian) but there are some others too

otherwise the safest way to get some that are 100% not counterfeit is ordering directly from a supplier, but that can be expensive . project n95 is inactive now but theres still a list of suppliers there !! 3m is really good from experience . u can also get n95s/kn95s/p100 respirators from home depot if u have one near u- however the supplyaid kn95s they sell arent very good, i had them and theyre better than nothing but they only have a 67% filtration rate (as opposed to the 95% expected from n95s and kn95s - thats what the 95 stands for i was mindblown when i discovered this)

also while im thinking about it, part of the reason n95s are more protective than kn95s despite both filtering 95% of particles is bc the seal on the n95 is a lot more reliable than the kn95 :}

me personally ive been getting mine from amazon (not recommended) (i have gift cards there so im not giving them My money at least) and trying my best to make sure they're legit . i referenced the 3m n95 1870s i got using this twitter thread and they seem to be legit? on amazon it also usually says where it ships from and check the storefront, the reviews etc etc. i basically have to do an entire vetting process every time its very annoying ❤️ it is a lot less expensive though, especially if they have a sale going . (here are the ones ive been getting- the listings look the same as of rn but amazon changes them all the time so take this with a grain of salt, person i imagined reading this in 2027. link 1, link 2)

ive tried the holy trinity (new term i made up for the 3m n95 1870 (red straps), 3m n95 9205 (blue straps), and 3m n95 9210 (braided white straps)) -- ime the 9210 definitely has the tightest head straps and i have an abnormally small head on account of being 3 inches tall and born in a thimble all alone . so thats something to be aware of, if u have an abnormally big head the 3m auras might not be the best bc of the strap tightness .

SORRY I'M LIKE INFODUMPING AT U NOW ..!! i have more though . If you know anyone irl who masks asking them where they get theirs might help, they might know stuff locally. ALSO speaking of knowing stuff locally- i don't know if this is universal but i have a friend who's getting really into asian cuisine and a lot of asian grocery stores ive been to with her in my area have had masks. that's such a long shot but ive seen them five out of six stores ive gone to and never at, like, hannaford or market basket or whatever.

OKAY ONE MORE THING . when i got my free masks from crane (SHOUTOUT CRANE I LOVE YOU CRANE) they also sent a thing abt how to reuse them that i will add !! they can be used for like 40 hours if theyre not visibly dirty or the straps dont break or anything

okay i am done infodumping now SORRY THIS IS SO LONG..!!! tldr: local mask bloc if it's an option is definitely the least expensive, project n95 compiled a bunch of links to buy from suppliers, home depot/other hardware stores are worth a shot, and amazon's an option especially if you're like me (poor but have money stuck in amazon gift cards) 🫡

[clangenrising]

i think the hate comes from the fact she still does try to justify/excuse Razor, despite hearing from many cats how horrible he was to them. like we know he is an abuser and a rapist. she thinks it's bizarre/odd/whatever that his rape victim (Scorch) calls the idea of him being sweet and caring 'nightmarish'. brother or not, he is emotional, physical and sexual abuser, and she still seems to find it weird that cats dont… tolerate him in the slightest. that does rubs as rape/abuse apologism bc 'he was nice to ME and he is MY FAMILY, he would NEVER do something like that..' soo many irl families have sadly ('no way my son could had possibly violated someone. this bitch is clearly lying and trying to ruin our family' type of shit you know)

like yeah having to live for months with people (cats) who killed your family member celebrated it is harsh, i do give her that ofc. on top of her kitten crash and being more or less forced to tend them or else, and she is in no good shape to properly accept and internalize the Shadow Truth. but many people irl dealt with people like her, trying to bend over and backwards to justify their family members and friends, even after coming in contact with those who were deeply hurt by them.

That is a good point, I see where you're coming from. Clearly you've been very hurt by this kind of thing in the past and I hope nothing I've done made you feel more hurt.

I was just surprised because Mystique isn't like, for example, a parent who makes excuses for a son who has been accused of sexual assault and insists that he's totally innocent despite evidence to the contrary. She's a victim too, even if she was never physically or sexually assaulted by Razor. All of her denials aren't meant to hurt the victims or protect Razor, they're to protect herself from the terrifying reality of her situation. Does that make what she did right? No, and I don't think I've ever said that, but I do think it makes it less deplorable.

As well, its not like Scorch has told her "he assaulted me." Scorch is VERY private and so that stuff isn't public knowledge. I feel like there might be some projection on to her because of information the audience has that she doesn't. As far as killing Smokyrose, that was framed to the city cats as a casualty of war, not the murder of a peace negotiator, and to her is similar to if say, Razor were a cop who shot somebody. We obviously would find that terrible but from her conservative point of view that's just his job, to protect the city from dangerous cats with lethal force if necessary. When she got to the Clans that became more complicated for her and she's hasn't ever once claimed Razor was in the right to kill her.

What she did ask for was that the fight be solved peacefully. As far as she knows, the Clans are blowing Razor's actions out of proportion and jumping to killing him when there could have been a different solution. Like, imagine if you went to a village and everyone there was like "your brother is an evil murderer" and then failed to present you with any substantial evidence. Who would you want to believe, the strangers ready to kill him or your brother who has only ever been good to you and everyone you know (or at least, you've rationalized his behavior to believe that's the truth, lied to your self enough that you believe it)?

This isn't to trivialize what you went through or excuse real life cases of people who deny heinous acts. This is simply to say, I feel like anyone who hates Mystique isn't engaging with the entirety of the story I'm telling. I understand, though, that this could be because of a defensive reaction and I don't mean to put any blame on someone who might be feeling that way. This is a complicated topic and its possible for neither party to be the bad guy in this situation.

[snowsays]

ok Keeper fans, I want yall to give me all your headcanons about Sophie and her friends (including Stina) that might fit a human au

the brainrot is real and I'm writing fanfiction for the first time in 12 years and it's a human, college au (tho the setting isn't exact, they're gonna visit Everglen and the college is gonna be Foxfire but other than that I think I'm gonna leave it up to imagination if this is a world where the elven cities exist as human cities, like a random human city called Eternalia, or if they don't exist at all). It's sokeefe, with maybe some dexiana in the background. I have some ideas but I need more info to fully pad their characters (imagine two hands filling a Sophie Foster stuffie)

For Sophie I'm keeping her fashion sense mostly t-shirts, jeans and sneakers. Not super baggy but also not form-fitting. Kinda like, baggy tshirt tucked into straigh leg jeans vibes. Not super colorful either. She still doesn't feel comfortable standing out.

I remember in book 1 she was listening to rock so pls recommend rock bands (I'm more of a vibe girly so I'll listen to whatever has a good sound and dont follow many artists/bands themselves so I only know like the 70s-80s classics and some random songs I think are cool, like Seven Nation Army and How Far We've Come), but I dont want to make her feel like a pick-me/im-not-like-other-girls so I kinda want to make her like pop too. And I already decided she likes the Deadpool movies (bc Amy has an X-Men tshirt in Nightfall, and Sophie makes a Rogue reference), but also romcoms. Also I'm thinking her and Stina would be in college to become vets

Biana is ofc a girly girl, I'm imagining mostly skirts and dresses, some jeans every once in a while, but also very stylish, idk about shoes tho, pretty sure in canon she wears heeled boots everywhere, but irl heels are tiring so...maybe sandals? I also imagine her as more of a pop girly with an edgy side in both music and movies, bc in canon she's not a damsel in distress, so I'm imagining she's an Olivia Rodrigo fan (not saying that Olivia is edgy...idk if she's edgy, I like her music but I wouldnt dare define it, she just popped into my head, as I said, I dont follow artists that much), and she would like both romcoms and action/spies movies (bc vanisher). I'm not sure about her major, I read a fanfic where she was a fashion designer and I like that, I was also thinking maybe art bc I just read a post that talked about how she painted over Tam's mom's painting in Nightfall. I know in the US she could do both but idk

As for the boys...I have no idea. I'm thinking Dex as a mechanical ingenieer (the spanish, french and english are all mixing in my brain and completely jumbled that word, sorry if its written completely wrong) bc ofc, technopath. Keefe as an art student, also he likes Deadpool too, and both beer and fruity drinks, and he still has Mrs Stinkbottom but I have nothing else on him, besides keeping his daddy and mommy issues ofc. Fitz I have no idea.

The rest of the gang I'm not sure if it's going to appear (I'm still trying to think if I should give Fitz a partner, and who would it be in that case), Tam might be mentioned tho, as the quiet fourth roommate of Dex, Keefe and Fitz, who doesnt like to mingle at parties much. But I'll be thankful for any headcanons you can give me of any member of the gang. Or facts that could be useful in a human au

This was longer than I expected, I'm sorry

[sodrippy]

one of these days i need the full story of your dnd mishap

😭😭😭 please

the short story is our party had three people (2 players + DM) who thought we were playing a fun friendly magical campaign and two people who wanted to recreate a critical role campaign amongst themselves...i think if youre familiar w cr you might immediately see the issue there.

long story is people put WAY way too much personal shit into their characters and almost immediately started taking the actions of characters as genuine irl slights and like. two sessions in had already lost sight of the difference between the pc and the player.

oh shit this got really long im sorry i dont think you care This much but i havent thought about it in a while and it bewilders me every time-

SO i was playing a cunty rogue and had TOLD everyone 'hey she is probably gonna clash w the party at first, but she'll warm up to everyone really fast, so dont worry about that' like it was clearly in the spirit of building a realistic character who had her own hangups etc. which i assumed the others would understand bc they'd done the same. plus is it not boring and unreal asf if a bunch of strangers meet after a murder of someone close to them and all just get along immediately w no suspicions or secrecy? cmon man.

and yet. the two cr-people got really weird about my pirate character stealing (???) and sincerely pulled the dm aside to express their concerns about the 'level of violence being enacted' and asked that we all try to be aware of what class of people we did crimes against. like. they wanted me to stop stealing from the 99% and ask everyone if they were rich before i picked their pocket ig. ALL THE WHILE. ONE OF THE OFFENDING PCS WAS IN THE MAFIA?????? LIKE. DIRECTLY EMBEDDED IN THE MAFIA THAT RAN THE TOWN.

i suppose that pc was off the hook bc he did possess the elf cock that the other guy wanted so bad, so. love won. i guess.

anyway they ended up taking hours out of our sessions to just dialogue-rp about slowly falling in love in a complex way or something. except then the non-elf player was like 'actually, dm, can you give me a love interest npc i need to add more depth to my character.' or smth, to which our dm lovingly crafted a beautiful working class hero of a guy. which the pc proceeded to hard reject. what was the point of any of this? we may never know<3

need to be clear as well this was all happening over discord bc we all live in different timezones, my very close friend was up at 2AM for this bullshit every week. AND he didnt even KNOW these other people very well, but suddenly theyre finding fault w not just his character but him as a PERSON? i just rmrd they accused him of like.....negatively influencing me??? like. MORALLY???? brother we have been friends for 10 years you are nothing to us you dont know us like that lol.

but they did REALLY really hate my character, which eventually made me feel like shit all the time bc like. obviously im putting work into her, its a creative construction and to have it railed against that badly is not fun. so i said ok you know what, ill just make a new character, hopefully thatll keep the peace and we can salvage this.

so i pitch a new character and oh they LOVE her. they fucking love her concept. which was so.........the first character was a lot easier for me to play bc she was a little more like me, and this character was specifically the opposite....how am i meant to take that reaction, yknow

which also reminds me: the original pirate rogue i played was a tiefling (yeah yeah gay stereotype i know. im not subtle or original, whatever) and there was a complaint (made only half-jokingly, ykwim) that she was too white.

shes not even HUMAN what the fuck do you mean shes too WHITE. IM not white that should imbue any character i create w an inherent not-whiteness. but even still, again, she is half sea creature. shes not. human. to be assigned a race like that....hello??

anyway so these two cr-rp players eventually blocked me and my friend on tumblr without saying anything, and got confused when we found out and said 'yeah ok we dont wanna play dnd with some guy who has blocked us on other social media' as if WE were the weirdos. like they saw no problem w continuing this disastrous campaign as long as they got their mandatory monologue time.

the worst part is my dm made SUCH a stunning campaign and world and it was so so so fun outside of this mess, i still feel really bad they never got to realise the world fully. plus my character had a sickass backstory thing where she was like. slowly unlocking latent magic the longer she spent underwater bc her demon parent was abyssal and stuff. which is whatever but the sick part is she was developing SCALES and maybe GILLS. in like a nasty gorey way it was gonna be so cool. but noooo lets talk about strange morality and your lameass god for 1.5 hrs. at 11pm on a friday.

[onemorecupofcoffee]

k so once a complete unknown comes out idk what i'll do. first off i have no idea if ill be hyperfixated on bob but it's been a LONG hyperfixation so yknow. maybe. and it's honestly only probably gonna be a year bc theyve made us wait sooo long and theyre done with filming and theyve recorded most if not all the songs and post production shouldnt take long bc theres not like huge cgi shit so. which means theres a good chance itll be out before winter 2025 . now i have irl friends who are timothee fans who want to see the movie when it comes out. so a lot of timothee fans will def go see the movie, but the general population?. i honestly dont know its def marketed more towardsa general audience but like its not like wonka was the biggest movie of the year or anything or the songs went off the charts. but my prediction is that one dylan song that wasnt as popular before will trend on tiktok or something bc timothee covered it and timothees version will become more popular than the og. idk which song bc im honestly not sure if theyre gonna do just any bob song or only the era presented in the movie. if its the era in the movie i think its gonna be an another side of bob dylan song bc that entire album is pretty underrated, except for my back pages it's not that popular for dylan, and it has a lot of lyrically amazing songs. im thinking maybe i dont believe you she acts like we never have met, n it would make sense to play in the movie. but it could be any song , like if theyre playing all eras bob then probably one of his newer songs. But a lot of timothee fans are like ok someones gonna get an oscar for something and im like . ugh no. but its a possibility bc oscars suck so then it would obviously become even more popular. theyre not gonna depict dylan correctly though and then people are gonna believe a scene in the movie actually happened and its like NO IT DIDNT just like the doors movie holy shit i hate that movie . but it could be decent it could turn out ok despite the horrid casting . do i think theyre gonna play other songs yes!!! not just dylan other baez, other folk songs definitely it actually seems like they paid attention to some things. the fashion was not it but the set decorators did an amzing job actually so it seems like there was SOME work that went into this movie. now i thijk theyre gonna end it at newport folk festival but they should end it at motorcycle accident but whatever . but its gonna be like mainl dylan i think but they said its an ensemble piece meaning its also gonna be focused on joan and fake suze rotolo/sylvie/ whatever the fuck her name is. and pete seeger bc hes been in a lot of the paparazzi pics so?. hes there too. and maybe woody guthrie hopefully woody guthrie obviously woody guthrie and they filmed in new jersey so its kinda like yeah. but hes gonna be sick so theyre not gonna really show him but theyre gonna show dylan meeting him. i dont think theyre gonna really show dylans childhood, yea timmy went to hibbing but everyone knows dylan lied a lot so no one knows anything about his childhood really. i think the main romance plot will literally just be bob being like choosing between joan and sylvie or some boring shit like that and theyre not gonna understand the weird fucking relationship bob had with joan or anything. but its gonna be dumb straight love triangle bc the writers are boring and not like im not there todd haynes where haynes understood dylan was queer as fuck and made multiple references to dylan being queer insome way theyre not gonna do that. and timmy will NOT top cate blanchett ever but he might win the oscar even though cate literally deserved that oscar. So the world will explode if it gets popular and then someone will cancel bob dylan or something . and bob dylan dies after seeing it "the worst experience of my life" and theyre gonna botch and popify the songssooo bad but theyre gonna get so popular its so dumb everything is dumb and then bob dylan will have a dumb modern resurgence but by people who dont know anything about him

and wont care to learn aside from that dumb biopic im sorry im welcoming new fans but i feel like theyre just gonna not actually wanna learn about him aside from timmy biopic . And its like. come on. but his records will get more popular and more valuable i mean gen z listens to a lot of physical media maybe his tour might be more popular too if hes still alive so in general people are like hey this guys pretty good or something but then everyone will kinda forget about him but sokme people will stay. i think . and then its like some weird shit gets out about him again he says something out of pocket about the biopic and then everyones like thats Odd. and the biopic keeps getting memed out of context maybe a bob meme will become very popular .. and timmy clitoris fans will be like this is the best film ever and petition for it to win best film at oscra s or something dymb andits all dumb stupif shit and then someones like Hey bob dylan was a fuckign faggot and everyone realises bob WAS fafuckin g faggot and its finally recognize d anf then people boycott the biopic bc it erases queer history rightfully so and then some people who dgaf about bob dont like the biopic and then timmy clitoris apologizes saying he didnt know and hes not queer though even though hes a fuciing twink and then bob slike yeha i had gay sex with george harrison. so what and everyones like Ohhh i knew it but those stupid people are like wtf? bob dylna is GAY? and then itslike ok open your eyes and then at the oscars timmy clitoris has to apologize again saying he didnt know bob dylan was queer and everyones like oh its ok but inrreality we hate you and cate blanchett knew it the whole TIME! and then the biopic is burned people burndown their copies of it and its INSANE and everyones INWSNE and then traveling wilbyurys biopic comes out and theres a sex scene with george and bob in like 2030 bc of the beatles biopics too ! and timyms like dsaved is my fav bob dylan album and he triesto join the fandom but everyone boos him and he dies before bob dies and alos never meets bob

[stardust-and-snails]

pinned post :3

hii !!! you can just call me bug !! i use dif names on dif blogs to make it harder for ppl who know me to find stuff that i dont want them seeing, so you might recognize me as someone else. if you recognize me from bloons tumblr, no you dont shh

im new to agere tumblr , but not to agere communities as a whole. my little age is usually 2-8 but sometimes higher or lower, & i'm 15 irl. im just getting back into agere after a long time of not rlly participating in it, i'm excited to make friends on here ^^

uuh. what else.

i like bluey (how original /sarc) and im kind of obsessed with the bloons games atm. i post about it sometimes, since ive been hyperfixated on it for so long. i also occasionally play roblox & animal jam!! i also like warrior cats

im a wolf therian & btd6 druid monkey fictionkin, which i probably wont post abt on here, since i already have a blog for that (dm if you want the url)

i also do agere moodboards sometimes! requests are currently open. i will do pretty much any fandom/source as long as it's sfw and i'm comfortable with it,,

just a warning, i curse. a lot. mute #swearing if thats a trigger for you

dni under the cut!

dni:

☆ anti agere, kinphobic, anti mspec lesbians/'contradictory' identities/xenogenders, js generally judgmental mean ppl :(

☆ proshippers, 'anti-anti', radqueers, pro ddlg, anyone who supports romanticizing & sexualizing messed up stuff

☆ endo 'systems'

☆ font users. excessive special characters, or text typed with special characters, make the internet hard to access with a screenreader, & blind people deserve access to the internet as much as anyone else.

☆ anyone with a blog you wouldnt show to a little kid (nsfw, sh/ed, stuff like that)

☆ people who appropriate the term "nonverbal", "semiverbal", or any verbal label. nonverbal means "unable to speak for several years or your entire life", it is not your term to use to describe you being too regressed to talk. i am so serious about this, STOP SPEAKING OVER HIGHER SUPPORT NEEDS PEOPLE. more info here

i have strong opinions on some discourse related stuff, but never engage in discourse. i only state my opinions here bc i dont want shitty ppl to think this is a safe space for them. please don't bring that onto my blog, just go away if you're here to argue.

[despiterage]

i feel like such a failure, honestly. and i'm so disillusioned with everything. i've worked the same job for 10 years, plus whatever garbage assignments they don't want to pay a proper amount for other people to do. i barely got paid enough to break even before a bunch of expenses came up, and now i'm slipping backward. there are so few other options for me; fewer still with even the minimal benefits i receive.

i've had to watch my multimillionaire boss snatching up land and building up dozens of new properties and having mcmansions built for all of his family while we havent gotten raises in ages, nor the bonuses we used to get for our efforts and loyalty. yet the community--who have never had to work for the man--expects us all to lick his boots and be grateful for how kind they perceive him to be to us. it doesnt feel real in the very worst way.

i don't have any irl friends. like ACTUAL friends. i have coworkers that i get along with well enough at work, but no one i can be my real self with. no one i trust with all that entails and no one i would call a friend, fullstop.

i am truly fearful of most of my family and their violent rhetoric and right wing ideology, so opening up to any of them--even the ones im not afraid of--is fully off the table.

i cant keep my space clean. i thought i had a decent handle on it, but while i was at work today a family member had to let a repairman inside to work on something. and bless her, i know she meant well. but when she messaged me to tell me she was cleaning, bc the place is a mess, i just... felt so hollowed out. so goddamn ashamed and numb.

i cant afford any sort of mental health treatment. when i was younger and still on my parents insurance, i'd been put on trial runs of a whole host of different antidepressants and literally only one combo worked at all, but it cost like 700 a month WITH INSURANCE and i felt so guilty about it that i refused to fill the script at the pharmacy. i cant even dream of paying that now.

i dont sleep worth shit. it takes me hours and hours to fall asleep at night; i sometimes sleep decently during the day when i can get a nap in--and after it takes me ages to actually fall asleep--but i am always playing catch up. bc when you cant fall asleep until 1, and you have to be up and out the door to go to work by 4:30, a nap here and there doesnt really make a dent in things. and really only further serves to fuck up my circadian rhythm. bc then, regardless of when i go to bed, i fall asleep even later.

my depression. and my fatigue. and my burnout. they all keep me from doing things i enjoy. things that might recharge me. i feel like im barely functioning 9 days out 10. like im just going through the motions. i feel like my skills are crumbling in my hands.

i cant even cry anymore. i think it would help, in a way.

[zzl0z3rxx]

Intro <3

Hii!! Erm this is my first time doing a into so pls bare with me here😭 This isn’t my 1st time on here or first acc. I was jus getting bored of my old acc so yaur

Erm so ig i’ll tell u some basic info

Im black 😭(so erm if ur racist pls stay like 6 ft away/jk but if u r racist I could care less bc I hate black ppl too 🥰/its giving uncle ruckus)

My fav emojis r:😭😔😛🥰😝💀🤓😼🙁

My fav colour is blue but I have more like sage green, red(all kinda tbh)/ any pastel colours/ and ermm I actually forgot 🙁

I draw erm yeah lol

Im problematic if u couldn’t tell 😭 but guys I promise im nice

My bday:6/26

Ermm i dont rlly have any preference for pronouns but im rlly jus used to she/her(not that im comfortable with those it’s just what my family uses bc ofc they would) but u can use any pronouns(actually no i do prefer he-him-they-them BUT ITS UP TO U GUYS BC IM A PPL PLEASER 😁😁😁😁😁😁)

Also u can call me by my real name Ari or some stupid nickname(pls make one for me) ALSO i have multiple little sonas like idk how to explain it like they’re all me/ for example:Adora Alex, Alex, Riri, Ri, Ira, Adora, and Axel and I think its more. Idk but like all them r the same person but in one IDK BC IDK IF ITS LIKE A DID THING OR NOT😭

I love-hate bugs like I made these lil comics with human designs for bugs and I love researching them but I hate seeing them irl😭 erm well im fine with grasshoppers and ants etc but others NO

Songs I like/love(NOT ALL BC WHO FINNA PUT ALL THAT)

(i love steve lacy/frank ocean/odd future/tyler, the creator/Dazey and the scouts/Destroy boys/AND LOITER SQUAD 😛😛)

ALSO IM NOT SHARING MY AGE ON HERE BC I DONT FEEL COMFORTABLE WITH DOING SO 🥰🥰🥰

My interests

Proships

Eddsworld

Among us(okay guys dont bully me but erm I used to draw among us nsfw/ IT WAS LIKE 2 MONTHS AGO DAWG😭)

Dead plate

Mitski

Tyler, the Creator(im literally getting audio cd’s for Christmas of his albums and I already have his vinyls except for bastard and goblin 😛)

Melanie Martinez

Incredibox Sprunki

Countryhumans(unfortunately 🙁/im a victim fr😔)

Countryballs ig

Ybf/your bf game(okay guys im just joking 😭)

Dick figures(I love this fandom so much, also unrelated but literally NOONE OR NOTHING CAN GET ME TO LIKE HOMESTUCK😭)

Fnf

Fnaf

My oc’s 😛

Pasta(like I rlly like pasta)

Ao3-Archive of our own

Scp

Htf-Happy tree friends

Oddbods(ik they literally don’t say shit and it’s cringe BUT I DONT GIVE A FLYING erm flip i was gonna say flip, but yeah jeff is my pookie fr 🥰🥰)

Necrophilia-other philia’s ig(idk if thats how u even spell it)

Mr. Circus Papa:Ghost eyes/The finger game/and the rest of his comics-art(some of his comics r on webtoon and other apps and u can see some art on patreon)(also bc i dont feel like putting it anywhere else, I DO NOT SUPPORT IRL INCEST OR OTHER STUFF THAT I SAID I ONLY LIKE FICTIONAL THINGS)

Erm im running out of things so MOVING ON

Also a lil not so fun fact/ I wear glasses 🥲

OKAY SO ERM I DONT RLLY HAVE A DNI BUTT(lol “butt”) I WILL SAY THIS IF YOU R LIKE 20-54(okay thats not even a possible scenario) DO NOT INTERACT PLSS but other than that ily guys :3

ALSO PLS DO DONT COME LEAVING DEATH THREATS OR HATE COMMENTS BC I WILL RECORD ME KMS/jk❤️🩷💕💕

Also this blog will be so boring and depressing 😭 like yk SH and vents and ED stuff ig but erm some other stuff this stuff will have ig(i dont wanna actually say bc yk digital footprint/lil bit too late for that bud)but like yk incest shotac0n and other crap idk im rlly lazy so I might not post at all(prob jus reblogs) OH WAIT ALSO I LIKE INVADER ZIM 🥰 forgot to mention that lol also I prob do have other interests too but idk oh I like coryxkenshin(idk how to spell his name😭) aphmau/SSSniperwolf/laurenzside and i kinda used to like inquisitor master(well I liked everyone besides her like yk sora, jaxx and etc.)

But erm guys I think that concludes this intro- OH MY OHIO SKIBIDI GYATT i forgot to tell yall, i know German 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰 but erm yeah thx for reading like fr tho bc not even my friends read the stuff I write for them 🙁 but yaur (i dont think im ever doing a intro again I rather just yap irl-I hate texting 😭)

ALSO IF U WANNA BMF PLSSSSS SAY SOMETHING IM SO LONELY LIKE PLS ASK TO BE MY FRIEND IM SO FREAKING DEPRESSED( I promise im cool :३) (Also if u need to vent my DM’S r always opened! Even tho I may reply late)

I made this at 1:00-2:46 am listening to loyalty by Kendrick im going to be so tired tomorrow 😭🙏(I gotta get up at 5:00 😁)

[snowfoxsakura]

Genshin-sona/self instert thingy wooooo

(I inserted the plushie i have irl too bc why not)

her name is still Sakura despite beng from sumeru but i'll explain that in a sec))

long and kinda sad/trauma filled/edgy backstory bc im incapable of making happy backstories for my self inserts))

She is the child of 2 adventurers from sumeru. as a toddler she always joined her parents' adventures. one day as they were going to inazuma through a ship they came across a big storm. that storm wrecked the ship and seperated her from her parents. no matter how much she tried to go near her parents and save them she couldnt do anything as a little girl. as what remained of the wrecked ship was sinking she hit her head, seeing a light blue light before falling unconscious.

she was later found by a wlw youkai couple on an inazuman shore unconscious, holding her plushie and a cryo vision, protected by a cryo shield. a shield that broke only when she woke up. Due to the head injuries and the trauma she suffered, she had forgotten alot of stuff including her own name and the faces of her parents. the 2 youkai decided to adopt her as they have always wanted a child and gave her the name sakura because of her pink eyes and flower shaped pupils. the 3 later moved to sumeru in order to be safe from the vision hunt decree.

Growing up she was surprisingly energetic and happy. she had a big imagination that made playing house with other kids so much fun and she gained a reputation for coming up with the wildest scenarios and stories.

She was never interested in being an academia researcher. her interest was more in visual arts and crafts. drawing, painting, crocheting etc. but her biggest passion was sharing her stories so she started practicing acting, later getting in zubeyr theater. quickly befriending alot of people there including Nilou.

due to her childlike nature people are very 50/50 about her. some find it cute, some dislike it. but her childish nature and big imagination caused her to be the only grown up who can dream and see the aranara in sumeru ((yeah even the akasha couldn't completely make her unable to dream, it limited her creativity alot tho))

in her dreams she would play with the aranara and lesser lord kusanali, who she knew as nahida and thought she is just a regular kid until the samsara incident.

outside of theater work she likes to take walks around the forest and draw anything she thinks is pretty. she always carries her pencils, brushes and paints in the bag she made herself.

in the archon quest she helped the traveler figure out they are in a repeating dream with nahida, who she found out is lesser lord kusanali way before the traveler.

if she was in the game she would probably appear in the nahida archon quest and any quest relating the aranara

for her world quest,i think it would be about her finding out about her birth parents and real name through the irminsul and her dreams with nahidas help. that would make for some emotional cutscenes xp

Playstyle: she is a cryo catalyst support and shielder. her skill makes a shield and creates energy particles when enemy hits the shield. her burst freezes enemies without needing hydro kinda like Zhongli's burst, also applies cryo to enemies and buffs elemental reaction dmg

i feel like she'd be a 5 star but idk y'all can decide

and before you ask,

Yes our oc's can be friends :3 and you can draw them together

(only as friends tho, or maybe mentor/ student too, idk just dont make it romantic, she already has a bf lolol

i might post him soon too)

[intertexts]

GMORNING !!!!! u know what time it is

EPISODE 8 TRIVIA:

- the big monster they fought in the beginning was called a Crawling Apocalypse which looks like this. terrifying !!!

- bizly really liked that william banished it. he was originally not gonna let him do that but then "i realized your character can do so little and that was cool so i said fuck it" we love william pity points he is such a loser and he rolls so terribly <3

- they start talking about one piece because grizzlys saying things abt how certain parts of dakota are inspired by luffy and bizly goes "ive never watched anime" which is the biggest lie in the world

- grizzly: "yknow we were about an hour into the episode before i realized wow i havent done anything productive yet"

condi: "you just hit on vyncents mom for like 20 minutes!!!!"

- and then they start talking about how dakota and chip (bizlys pc from riptide) would either be best friends or hate each other which is really funny bc there are now MULTIPLE what if crossover episodes where they meet and interact and thats exactly the dynamic . i love them

- condi wasnt expecting his dad to be dead, he thought theyd have to fight him

- he kind of hesitated taking the sword !! vyncent doesnt really know how to feel about using something that belonged to his father

- he wasnt entirely Present for the part where his dad betrayed the party, he was sort of fading in and out of consciousness so theres a chance he didnt actually get the full picture. condi knows this out of character and vyncent knows it in the back of his mind somewhere that his dad might not actually be fully evil but hes too angry to come to terms with that yet

- hes struggling a lot with the fact that his mom.doesnt know about the betrayal. he doesnt want to tell her because "its not his fathers pride at stake, its his mother's memory of him" and that makes me so . :(

- THE GREATS!!!!!!!! THE GREATS ARE HERE i love the greats. surely nothing bad is happening to them

- they have a couple theories as to whats going on with the greats:

-- condi: theyre in this state because vyncent took too long getting them back here out of his head

-- condi: they were killed when they got transported to the other world and there was no way to get them back completely

-- charlie: something happened in the time where vyncent was transported to prime and the greats had died, so someone did something to keep them alive by putting them in his head. maybe they could only be kept alive by being in vyncents head

- grizzly tries to insight check bizly irl to see if any of their theories are close so far. this does not work . he rolled a 17 btw

- none of them trust minerva they think she might be secretly working with the lich. bizly defends her by saying "shes also in the middle of basically an apocalypse i think shes allowed to be a little mean to you"

- le frog is the only french person ever. this is brought up with NO context no explanation

- bizly is sharing some of the thumbnail art from youtube because this was right around the time the first few episodes were being put up publically !! most of them are just the same as the official refs but the most important one is le frog bc im not actually sure if youve seen his offical design yet . also tide used to be white. we dont have to talk about white tide

- bizly says pd feels more like a DC comic than a Marvel comic. hes right about this

- charlie starts talking about marissa meyer books and this is important 2 me because the lunar chronicles was an extremely formative piece of media for me . she apparently has a book called renegades thats superhero themed and i have not read it yet but i put it on my list specifically because of this. wahoo!

tgis is SUCH good trivia for this ep thank u dude... ouagh. really solid meal here. i love these last couple episodes so much.. there's so much fun stuff happening here i'm enjoying all of the greats stuff & getting like a solid Vyncent Moment for a while.

i LOVE the william pity points its great! it WAS cool as fuck!! also i gain +5 hp every time a gm goes "who give a shit if this isn't technically how the game mechanics should work, it's fun for everyone at the table & makes for something cool and makes sense narratively."

that being said. i DID take SO MUCH PSYCHIC DAMAGE from how long dakota spent hitting on his fucking mom. Please. Please king !!! sob.

I ALSO WAS EXPECTING THEM TO FIGHT VYN'S DAD???? still not unconvinced that some lich undead bullshit isn't going to happen with that. god i'm so invested in figuring out what HAPPENED there... i love this type of murder mystery situation. & i also was genuinely unsure if he would take the sword or not!! really kind of an ohhh shit! moment when he did. imo. vyncent virion sol i love u.... also it's still INCREDIBLY funny 2 me that he's still in his normal clothes. i have not forgotten that he is just doin his fantasy bullshit thing in the just some guy drip. (<- i might have forgotten something but i've been assuming they no longer have/wear Official Hero Drip since they're no longer really sanctioned or on great terms w/ them? also i've been assuming that the episode-specific clothes & shit isn't really permanent... now that im thinking about it though please tell me wiwi hardcore blue flame black leather kickass spiky biker jacket remains. it's too cool for him. but. still.)

I LOVE THE GREATS SO MUCH... i hope nothing permanently bad happens to them :( i like them so dearly..... you know they r really solid folks because they spent a YEAR and change living in a teenager's brain & came out of the experience still bein so nice 2 him.... augh. also in general big fan of the system-adjacent bullshit :] i love it when theres. guy with guys in his head. etc. will b sad ab their departure but i hope they r OKAY and return 2 Being Alive & shit!! nervous laughter. also god i can't wait to find out what Actually Happened with them. hhrhrghghgghh.

THIS IS SO TRUE ALSO???? free my girl minerva she did nothing but have Literally Normal Reactions to TERRIBLE things happening!!!

I DON'T LIKE THAT LEFROG FACT. it raises the question of is he actually even french or like, is there even a point of reference for his behavior. like. What is going on there. Horrifying thank you!!!! also man this entire degree im working on would be useless! well. maybe prime quebec exists. somehow. independently of a hypothetical europe. HIS DESIGN IS SO FUN BTW. its so cute.. i WAS kind of imagining a mutant Big Real Fucking Frog situation but i think this is a lot more reasonable. also literally ignoring white tide I Do Not See it. It Does Not Exist.

ALSO. NOT GOING TO START TALKING AB COMICS FOR EVEN MORE PARAGRAPHS. BUT. he is so so so right. (<- dc comics guy with Opinions. well. technically im not even much of a dc guy im just a vertigo guy. but. still.) hghghghbhgh.

[voidsquidd]

I loved your post abt sh/ed stuff on the internet and im really glad someone is talking abt it to such extent but I wanted to ask your opinion on something. For me at least it is comforting to find people who struggle w the same stuff and have thoughts like mine I feel less alone in this world. Its hard to find ppl like that irl not only bcs ppl aren’t always open about their issues but also bcs you have to be extremely vulnerable with others to open up, talk abt it and perhaps you’ll find someone that understands you. If two friends are the same they comfort each other often feeling that they are the only ones in the world that understand each other but they also encourage each others behaviour bcs thats their life, they live off of that, they cant escape their pain. And if one of them gets clean the other will be torn for obvious reasons. I understand that young ppl are more prone to harm but they wouldn’t feel the need to sh or try to cut deeper if it wasn’t for the already existing pain. And sh or ed isn’t something that only exists online, yes it’s more glorified but they might learn it irl and due to the lack of info they might use more dangerous methods. On the internet they can learn abt aftercare, going to the er, infections, mental health institutions since irl very little ppl talk abt that, the dangers dangers of starving so they might just eat less, workout more, take their vitamins instead of going for highly destructive behaviours only bcs in their mind ‘if I dont eat I’ll be skinny’. People will always seek comfort everywhere they go and if they lack love and attention irl off they will think their groomer loves them and ‘they are mature for their age’. These are only the results of many issues and the primary thing in a persons life is the real world. Their family, friends, teachers. If all or most or even some of those people fail them they might think they have nowhere else to go so they live in the fake world that provides more comfort than the real one. If they are unable to find happiness anywhere they highly depend on the dopamine hormones that might be released through harmful stuff they see. People online who struggle w different stuff aren’t mental health professionals and cannot help themselves nor those around them. They can try but there is no guarantee that their efforts won’t go to waste or even be more harmful. They, like many people could see sui as their only way out of the pain. For some reaching out for help is not an option or they do not see it as an option. The ‘promotion’ of harmful activities are the only way for some people to validate their suffering and pain that they feel. They NEED to find comfort in something, find ppl that understand them and they unite through the mutual pain and their mutual issues. Im sorry that its so long and please correct me if any of the stuff I said is not true or harmful.

U do have valid points, which is why young kids go on it anyway. But I still believe it does more harm than good as I've seen that many times. There are places and ppl online that offer support in recovery and aftercare, who do not run shed accounts and don't glorify it, I'd recommend looking for accounts like that. Id also recommend doing research on mental health if u struggle with it as a better understanding will help u feel less alone, as well as give u better knowledge of ur behaviours and the reason behind those patterns. U can look up how to take care of a wound and find explanations for ur issues it that don't come from accounts that post their own sh and things like that. Ofc u can google how to make it worse too but you'd probably get a warning and sui hotline before any actual tips, and it's better becuz u have to look up seperate things, so if ur looking for recovery tips u won't see the opposite accidentally. Same goes for eds

As for it being from their real life and their issues, someone's real life won't have sm shed content, like u said its not common for ppl to just go and talk openly irl about it so it helps u stay away from loads of content. Like I said the internet can make u consume sm about it that it literally becomes all u think about, and hopefully irl you'd have things to distract u, even if not friends, u can try to find hobbies like reading and drawing to distract urself, or just avoiding pro shed stuff and spending ur time watching shows. I understand some ppl may have extremely abusive parents so doing anything is gonna be hard, but u don't have to go on places that spread and normalise it, there's ppl who denormlize it and talk about how they survived their abuse on places like TikTok and yt. They talk about these things and make u feel less alone but they won't promote it, show pictures, give out tips on how to get worse, they give out tips on recovery and getting thru it. One person that comes to mind is of herbs and alters on yt, she posts about her ana recovery and how it started, all the ppl she's literally had to see die becuz her friends we're also disordered.

And u mention that it's nice to have friends who can relate, but it's also good to have friends who can't but can still show sympathy for u. If two ppl struggle with sh or Ed's, they're gonna trigger each other, they're gonna relapse while they're both tryna get better and they're gonna have a very unstable relationship, where they have to keep on eye on each other and they eventually feel like they cant vent or open up becuz they'd be putting a burden on someone who is also in a bad headspace at the time. It's not healthy to have ur only support be ppl who also needs support, ur gonna end up dragging each other down. It's nice to have ppl like that but u need ppl who don't struggle as much who are willing to help, they won't get triggered or be too unstable to support u. For example if two ppl are struggling with sh and one of the relapses the other may relapse, or if one needs to vent but the other one is also doing really bad they're either gonna vent and make their friend worse or they're gonna bottle it up and make themselves worse. But if they have a stable friend who doesn't struggle, u can vent and ask for help without risking triggering that person or making them worse becuz that person doesn't have issues, at least not as many.

Basically ur support system needs to be strong enough to give u support, and if they're offering that support then going on places that will encourage u to do worse is unfair to them too, becuz they're putting in effort to help u and ur going to be triggering urself by going on sh edtwt/tblr which will give them more work to help u. And that's not even their responsibility, when u ask to vent, ur asking someone to step up and help u, they have no need to say yes, it's their choice whether they do or not and if u don't put in effort, they shouldn't put in effort to help u. Ur putting pressure on them, and ofc if they're in a stable place and want to help they should, but if u keep looking at sh or thinspo, and getting triggering and going to them, ur gonna tire them out and hurt them. They'll feel like their effort is wasted and either blame them selves or refuse to help becuz they see ur not avoiding triggers and are just making it worse. If u wanna get better then get off those apps and talk to ur friends who have given u consent to vent, avoid triggers and ask for help when u feel u need it.

I promise it's not hard to meet non shed friends online, so u can meet ppl who have good enough mental health to also help u becuz they don't have to worry sm about their own

And home life is tough, there's no way to just get out of an abusive situation, or make bullies leave u alone, or get irl friends if ppl don't like u, but there's ppl who can relate to that who won't tell u it's fine to hurt urself, I have met most my trusted friends online and they support me and each other, there's so many different types of ppl and some of them will have similar interests, u will find someone who won't judge u, u will find loads of ppl

I hope that makes sense

My dms are always open and I'm always ok answering questions ^^

[falllpoutboy]

you’re so right bc would the articles be written if ayo was white? they don’t do this with paul and daisy….they were also doing this last year when people were shipping syd and carmy in s2. i mean he calmed down after thinking about her during a panic attack, she was put into a montage with claire after he said he’s going to see his gf (that was really on the nose imo so i don’t know how people missed it) and the table scene??? like why is it so controversial for black women to be involved in romantic relationships with white men?? why does it have to be such a topic of discussion? now i don’t know about ayo and jeremy, it could be platonic or not, but that’s their business, but it’s weird for articles to be written about how they are most definitely platonic and how no one should assume they’re romantic. what if they were? then what? it’s so weird like let them be. at first, i thought ayo would appreciate those articles bc they weren’t assuming her and jeremy were romantic, but then it got weird very quickly. two different vogue writers wrote two different articles about this. then a dazed writer wrote one too… very reputable sites/magazines. like is this real life? would this be a convo if she was a white girl? i highly doubt it. it would be a completely different reaction. why is a topic of discussion? why are they so upset about people being like ‘oh i wonder if it could be romantic?’ jesus. the convo died down quickly along, now they’re extending the convo through these articles…

this absolutely would not be topic or a discussion if jeremy was caught rubbing molly's back or if ayo was white. the tone of the articles wouldn't be as condescendingly speculative as they are right now. OF COURRRSEEE THEY ARE ONLY JUST FRIENDS!! DONT YOUR FRIENDS PLATONICALLY RUB YOUR BACK ALL THE TIME???!!

i do believe after their viral behavior at the golden globes and the emmys this year, people (fans and the press) were absolutely going to keep their eye out for any other slip ups in the public eye. everyone knew they had chemistry on set when they're in character and now everyone knows they have chemistry irl too. whose skin would it be off of anyone's back if they were involved irl? why is it so hard to believe that this specific white actor and this specific black actress might be a thing? why is there so much negative pushback?

m i s o g y n o i r

[cloverwood]

☾ ﾟ｡⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡ ⋆｡ﾟName Hoard ⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡☁︎｡｡ﾟ

just a little living post for me to keep all the names I've started collecting. It's actually something I started doing long before my awakening just by chance (having usernames/nicknames for different friends or groups and realising that felt rly good) so now that I'm doing it more consciously I just want somewhere I can keep track of them. Kinda wanted somewhere a bit more private and I might end up moving to my diary discord but I also think its nice and wanna be able to share it so. For now I'll make it a post :3

I've realised that the "main" name I've been going by, since I was like 13 always felt kinda? odd? like it was my NAME but not in a 'this is me way' and more of a 'this is the mouthsounds one makes to get my attention' kinda way. like how one would name a dog. if that makes sense? as a wakened fae entitity, i've realised i may (or may not) have some sort of "true" name, but if i do I don't know of it yet. But every other name I go by or collected so far are what I call "utility names" and I think that's useful to know too <3

Each name sometimes has rules or fun little bits of info hence why I wanted to write it out like this. But if someone knows of a site similar to that pronouns tracker one but for names that would be kewl :3

Nix - meatspace name, ie; "real" chosen name. real in brackets bc it's what I say to ppl when I dont have the energy to discuss my name thing. What my friends and family call me, how I'm credited in my TV/film work, etc. What I'll probably change my legal name to eventually. Anyone can call me this.

[deadname] - a name that has since achieved it's purpose and is no longer of use to me. No one can call me this.

Helio - my artist/online username. shortened version of my full usernames (heliocanix. heliosynchronisity and others). Realised I also like being called this in online spaces but even irl i suppose. Kind of a secondary name. Anyone can call me this.

Neifion - my "utility" fairy name. Mostly just for fun and as a way to talk abt my fairy experiences separately from my human ones. Mostly just found it in order to easily describe "who" im drawing in my fairy self portraits when I'm too shy to say its just me. Only other fae can call me this.

Clover - just a name I recently realised i connect to quite well, surprisingly unaware that it was literally half of this blogs name at the time :'D but it makes a lot of sense. One of my earliest OCs was named clover and she had plant powers hehe. Feels connected both to my rabbit identity and fairy identity. Currently only my romantic partner can call me this. Thought it could make a nice thing to share between us, as well as the only person I would be comfy using it.

Angel - my kink pseudonym/persona/nickname, used when I'm at events or during scenes with play partners. Only people in my local scene can call me this.

[any sort of pet name] - certain partners use petnames or nicknames for me, changes depending on human or circumstance. Obvs, only partner's can use these.

N - shortened form of Nix, what I use when my name isnt important, surveys, emails etc. Considered making this my legal name but figured it would cause more problems than it solves. Interestingly this does feel the closest to what could be my "true" name but i have a feelings it's because said name might not be translatable or comprehendable to human speech. anyone can call me this, if they want?

NIX - all capitalised, my fine art name/persona. May change may not, I sign off and credit all my work to my name stylized like this. No surname. Only really applicable in these settings.